Tamrielic Colonies of Yneslea, Volume I: The Ice Cream Orcs

Octavius Romulus, Ex-Legionnaire Courier and Member of the Surveyors Guild

Circa 4E 201

####CHAPTER ONE: ON ICE CREAM ORCS

Unlike the Wood Orcs of Valenwood, the Iron Orcs of Craglorn, or the Orsinium Orcs of the Dragontail Mountains the Orcs of Yneslea seem to boast a society that is saturated with both ancient Orcish customs and the traditions of the natives of their island home. This is understandable, of course, for these Orcs have been living on the islands of Yneslea for more than two hundred years ever since the latter parts of the Third Era. A common misconception to Tamrielic scholars is that the Ice Cream Orcs are completely indigenous to the Ynesleaic archipelago and are of a different strain than the ones of Tamriel – this is absolutely false, of course. The Ynesleaic Orcs are still descended from the original followers of Trinimac that were transformed when the Aldmeri War God became Malacath, the Daedric Prince of Curses, like any other Orc.

The Ice Cream Orcs are descended from the Orcish migrations to Yneslea back in 3E 425 when the former Imperial territory was opened for colonization by Uriel VII. The Orcs were able to settle firmly with the islands’ way of life, and were able to form bonds with the native Echmer (who shared their disdain for cowardice and magicka as well as their respect for bravery and honorable combat) and the Hyu-Ket (a subspecies of goblins, a race Orcs have always treated like kin) with ease. When Old Orsinium was destroyed at the beginning of the Fourth Era many more Orcs tried migrate to the main Ice Cream Orc settlement of Orsungur, but eventually founded their own stronghold due to religious and cultural disputes. The two groups eventually fused together in 4E 175 because of the Brigand Rebellion however, and have remained that way ever since.

The Orc race in general have always had difficulties interacting with the other races recognized by the Empire, but the Ice Cream Orcs in particular have even more problems (like other Yneslean-born Tamrielics) due to infusing a lot of Echmeri and Hyu-Ketic customs into their distinct culture. They are much more pessimistic, survivalistic, blunt, and snarky than the Orcish communities that live in Tamriel. However, due to the fact that they are not so openly persecuted as other Orcish groups they are much more open to trading and communicating with fellow Ynesleans, but are a bit suspicious of absolute foreigners. They make their living herding both the Wrothgarian Pig (which they brought with them from Tamriel) and the indigenous yak, which the Echmer taught them how to care for and milk correctly, as well as hunting and trading the hides and chitin of the Ynesleaic archipelago’s mammal and insect life.

Ice Cream Orcs have a physicality similar to the Echmer due to their diet mainly consisting of insect meat, pork, and dairy consumables. Because of this they are both leaner and stronger than Tamrielic Orcs, making them more dangerous in combat as well. They also tend to wear light armor, a sharp contrast to the heavy armor almost always worn by Orcs (except for Wood Orcs).

Unlike most Orc strongholds, the main settlement of Orsungur is comprised of two main religious groups: the Oztraki and the Cult of Trinimac. The Oztraki are traditionalists who hold to the long-standing belief in Malacath that the Orcs have followed since the Merethic Era. They insist that Trinimac and Malacath are the same entity and that Malacath is what became of Trinimac after Boethiah transformed him. The Cult meanwhile teaches that Trinimac and Malacath are distinct entities and that Trinimac, rather than Malacath, should be worshiped. Cult canon holds that with enough mythic power the Orcs can strip the essence of Malacath from Trinimac and restore both him and them to their Aldmeri glory. Ever since coming together in 175 the two have learned to cooperate, although tension still remains high amongst them. Luckily the current Chieftain Krognaz gro-Makoza, having been originally raised in an Exul family, has been able to keep fighting from happening between the two groups since he began his chiefdom in 193.

####CHAPTER TWO: HOW TO APPROACH AN ICE CREAM ORC

When meeting a Ynesleaic Orc you must first prove your worth to him or her and earn their respect. For example, when the Orcs first tried to trade with the Exul the latter refused to interact with them because of their xenophobia. In anger the Orc trader challenged the offensive Exul to a duel, not knowing that such a thing was an important show of honor in Echmeri society. The Orc won the fight, and the two races have been on affable terms ever since. It has even become customary for an Ice Cream Orc and an Echmer to have a friendly spar before trading to honor both of their peoples.

Here are a few other ways to start a conversation between an Ice Cream Orc. As a sign of respect, make sure to introduce yourself or at least establish eye contact first with the individual in question first:

  1. When you see an Ice Cream Orc out hunting on the islands, challenging them to a contest on who can kill the largest or deadliest animal is a quick way of getting their attention. Winning the contest will earn you the Orc’s approval.

  2. Find some way for an Ice Cream Orc to begin making snide comments about you, and when they do make some snide remarks of your own. Keep exchanging sarcastic statements until you get the last word, and the Ynesleaic Orc will view you in a much better light.

  3. Although it may seem ill-advised, starting a fistfight with an Ice Cream Orc will either result in your death or you being seen as an honorable individual to the Orc for the rest of your life.

I’d advice using the above methods with caution, for Ice Cream Orcs are not as predictable as Tamrielic Orcs and are rather interesting individuals that require much improvisation when dealing with them. However, there are two things you must definitely not do when conversing with Ynesleaic Orcs and I’ll end this tome by describing them here:

  1. Do not in any circumstances show favor for either the Oztraki or the Cult of Trinimac when those two groups are brought up in conversation. Since there isn’t really a way to tell them apart, making the wrong choice in dialogue can result in the Orc in question either refusing to talk to you anymore or pummeling you in the face.

  2. Insulting or trying to hurt a Hyu-Ket in an Ice Cream Orc’s presence will only serve to anger them. The Ynesleaic Orcs have come to view the insectoid goblins almost like a brother or sister would view a younger sibling, and will defend them if need arises.