In defense of the Amulet of Mara

Marriage in Skyrim was a bit of a farce. We all know it. Slap on an amulet, approach an eligible partner, and bam, you're getting married. I haven't really encountered anyone who thought it was anything put a tacked on afterthought and shouldn't be taken as representing anything in-universe.

But, being the nerd that I am, I think it can be incorporated in such a way that is interesting, and also makes the overall experience feel a little less cheap.

Now, throughout history, different cultures have had different methods of identifying eligibility for marriage. These haven't always been exclusion identifiers (such as the modern Wedding/Engagement Ring) but have from time to time been used as inclusive markers of interest. Things ranging from charms/bracelets/idols to attire to even place of residence have been used to identify that you are A: Not yet married and B: Interested in formulating a relationship. So, the idea of an amulet, linked to the cult of a god whose sphere encompasses marriage and the household, being used in a similar manner isn't particularly outlandish.

In essence, the Amulet of Mara does exactly as advertised. It tells others around you that you're single, and looking for a relationship. It's an identifier for others that you are open to approach, and serves as sort of a flag for future relationships. Of course, Skyrim skips over the actual courtship process, but I think it's reasonable to assume that, generally, it takes weeks, months or even years for that relationship to progress.

But, it definately doesn't seem particularlly common. Finding an Amulet of Mara 'In The Wild'. Why is this? If the Amulet of Mara is the cultural identifier for 'I'm Single' why aren't there more around? One explanation could be that the Civil War has somewhat drained the sea of fish... But I find this unlikely since no potential partner seems to be in posession of an Amulet themselves. Which seeks to imply that it is either an uncommon method, or they aren't actually that interested.

You then have the fact that the Amulet costs money, and is produced by a religious institution. While not certian by any stretch, these two influences could suggest a degree of ideological and financial manipulation and an attempt to control marriage by the Cult of Mara. So, presenting the Amulet as THE way to get married is similar to the tradition of requiring a priest to officiate a wedding in many parts of the western world. It a the Temples way of trying to enforce control.

But, we do see that, despite being somewhat uncommon, it is accepted, so it's definitely become part of the recognised traditions and practices of Skyrim. An Amulet of Mara, while not necessary, does 'Flag' you as looking for a relationship. It may be a little uncommon, and may seem a touch desperate, but it's place in the culture and the world is rather grounded.

TL/DR: The Amulet of Mara isn't just a sloppy gameplay mechanic, but is Skyrim's equivelent if EHarmony. A somewhat sad and desperate way to identify that you're looking for love.