Notes on Racial Phylogeny, Fourteenth Edition: Paternity and Cerumen (Earwax)

by the Council of Healers, Imperial University

While the progeny of interracial couple usually exhibit the racial traits of the mothers, it has hardly been studied on how to determine a reliable methodology for determining the paternal ancestral lineage aside from small and hardly noticeable traits that vary case by case. Newer studies have shown that cerumen (earwax) may be the key to determine the paternal racial identity of nonsectarian families. This case study is still in its infancy, but has brought forth many enlightening results, but we should stay reserved as there is not enough recoded information to be able to tell how reliable it yet is.

Cerumen is a waxy substance found in the ears of all Men/Mer subraces, (and indeed in all creatures with ears), but the consistency, odor, and color has been discovered to vary between them. The races of men typically show signs of wetter, stickier, yellow/white, and more odorous Cerumen, while the waxes in the ears of the Merish races tend to be dryer, clearer, odorless, and more prone to form crystalline structures within the ear canal. However, upon examination of certain patients, the healers involved in the study found that their cerumen did not match that of their appearance and their maternal lines, but did infact match that of father’s. Due to this, and multi-provincial study was launched to identify the strongest inheritable traits of cerumen in each of the races that seem to be passed on to the paternal offspring. Here are the results.

Colovian/Nordic/Nedeic decent exibit the typical sticky, yellow or white, and slightly odorous wax that appears to be typical of the manly races. Bretons however exibit the color and odor similar to this, but the consistence and structure more resembles that of the wax of the Elves. Redguards exhibit a wax similar in consistency of the other men, but lack the odor (reportedly even pleasant smelling). What was found that is most surprising is that Cyrodilic families who report to have Akaviri progenitors in their lines, had whitish wax that seemed to dry on the inside walls of the ear canal, and would shed as if skin.

Altmer and Dunmer both predominantly exhibit cerumen that is dryer, clear or almost colorless, and normally odorless wax which collects and forms crystalline like structures which grow and crumble, which need extracted routinely as a part of the typical self grooming regiment. Bosmeri earwax is problematic, as the structure of the cerumen often differs drastically, even within the same individual between visits. The only constant of the bosmeri earwax is that you constantly will find contaminants within it, rather if insect, dirt, bits of foliage, etc.

These results were taken and applied to the examination of interracial offspring and their mother and father. It was discovered that 9 out of 10 of the mixed race offspring, did in fact develop the same type of earwax as their male patent. So if you want to find out the paternal ancestory of someone… it may be that you only need look in their ear to find out.

Additional study notes

Surprisingly… examination of the beastial Orcish race show signs of their cerumen being completely identical to that of the wax of Altmer and Dunmer. The only difference being the odor (smelling like rotten meat), although no examinations were ever preformed on living subject, just cadavers. So the sample may have been contaminated.

Khajiiti wax is reportedly brown or black, smelly, and also forming crystalline structures. But theses samples were only observed in Khajiit who were ill, mostly with infections within the inner ear canal. No healthy Khajiit is yet to submit itself to examination, so the normal attributes of the cerumen is still a mystery.

Argonians, dispite being without ears, too seem to have a wax like substance that covers the tympanic membrane covering that is the closest approximation to an ear the lizards have. The substance coats the membrane serving as soft and waterproof “outer skin” for the “ear”.