A Khajiiti Bedtime Story: How Lorkhaj stole the Moons from the ja-Khaj’ay.

“Hush there, little one... the day has passed and so you must sleep under the silent guardianship of the Moons. Will you do that?

Don’t lie to me. This one knows what it means to be a liar, for that is the way of Khajiit. Well, not quite.

Our beautiful Clan Mother would ostracise me for this bluntness, this usurpation of her role, but I must tell you: the way of the Khajiit is in the keeping of secrets. Secrecy is the greatest form of deception and devotion, and so it allows the Khajiit to protect themselves from foreigners, intent on belittling and chastising us. But only the Clan Mother dispels such rumours!

Don’t test me, little one. You will not leave because this one will not allow it. You act as would the ja-Khajiit, Merrunz, after his siblings scarred him with what would become his mighty and fearsome Claw.

Maybe if you could deceive, you could creep away, but you still do not understand: each deception has nothing in common. A Khajiit may cheat and lie, or confess and proclaim, or perform any such actions of cunning; whatever a Khajiit does, the cat must circumvent the truth, to alter the other’s perception. This is how we survive: we tell stories enough to renew ourselves in the minds of our enemies, and in this way, deception is sacred: we Destroy a truth to Create another, thus changing Fate at the will of the Moons.

Tell you what: how about a story? This one knows many, some that will teach you in the oxymoronic ways of the Khajiit. Come, little one; silence your mews, for I am certain you will enjoy.

Back in the days of angry Ahnurr and humble Fadomai, there was no passing of Time. Oh, you thought Alkosh did that? Ha! Deception of another is an art, but deception of the self is folly. You should know the truth, but you have fallen into the auto-sabotage known as gullibility. Suspicion and curiosity will prevent you from such mistakes.

Anyway, this one digresses, and the lights are dimming. There was no time. But events transpired, myths occurred, stories such as we could not imagine unfolded: stories more shrouded than Mafala herself.

But how could narratives exist in the timeless time? Through the Phases. As Clan Mother Ahnissi told her daughter, who told us all in the greatest secrecy: “And many Phases passed.”

These Phases are what bind the litters of Ahnurr and Fadomai’s play fights. Our world and the worlds of the others of the litters owe our very existences and forms to the Phases.

But the Phases were nameless and unknown and unconscious until Fadomai’s third litter. The Phases went unnoticed, dancing and prancing in their illustrious passivity: they showed Fadomai how to deceive, being the first to do so, and this is how the third litter was born.

And her first children were twins: Jone and Jode, known by sacrilegious names to the hairless ones. They knew their purpose: they were to embody the Phases, so that each Phase would become one of their Motions: and so the Phases knew themselves as the ja-Khaj’ay, the Wardens of the Worlds. They are the most noble of all Ada, and most others don’t even worship them! Some do not even ACKNOWLEDGE them!

But enough of this one’s rage: rage is glaringly and awfully obvious, and thus to be used with great meticulousness. The ja-Khaj’ay facilitated Nirni’s stabilisation, and sacrificed themselves fully to form the Lattice that binds all worlds. Oh, the tailless and scaled ones would tell you that they are so important, and that that is why Nirni is the centre most of all worlds. Utter profanity! She is the centre most because the ja-Khaj’ay CHOSE her to be so, and thus structured all worlds around her sands and forests. After all, Nirni is different from all other worlds, as we well know.

Thus do the blessed Moons guide us even to this day. They control the passing of stories and are the true progenitors of all. Witness when Alkosh was broken: the Moons retained their paths. We Khajiit we always keep the Moons safe if ever greater powers intervene. Hircine? Why, that Hungry Cat only dyes the Moons with the Blood of the Hunt as his spirit crosses their holy Lattice. But why do they disappear, you say? Oh, tiny kitten, the Moons uphold all worlds, not just ours. When they disappear they dart around in unexpected directions, to safeguard the other worlds. They are the Protectors and Distributors of Fate. Hermorah?! No, he simply is superiorly intelligent enough to interpret the Moons, and controls the Tides, so he mostly accurately deciphers the Fortunes of Worlds.

The Moons are not bound by time, as all true cats know, so while each cat’s fate seems to differ from the next, that is only within the linearity of Alkosh. A cat may be punished for their future iniquities. A hateful fool may receive rewards for a future kindness. The ways of the ja-Khaj’ay are not understood, but understand, little mewing kitten, that they will always guide and protect you.

Back to the story. Remember Lorkhaj? Well, as kind as he was, giving a home to his sister — our lovely but confused Nirni — his Heart was so consumed by Namiira that he sought the decay of others, that he might be eternal. The Great Darkness had devoured his Heart, making him the first bent cat. This is why we only acknowledge him. For, though he was initially thoughtful and lent his claw to our very inception, he is too impulsive, like a cat on skooma. No wonder our depraved relatives connect him with Sheggorath.

Alkosh, hearing of Lorkhaj’s greed (remember, Lorkhaj’s crimes were not the worst, but his brutishness made him dangerous and vicious), punished and tore out his Heart, an act which Alkosh, as the Dragon King of Cats, made true and irreversible, at the decree and commission of the Moons and their Motions.

However, Lorkhaj’s spirit, boisterous and undying like his vile and corrupted Heart, scrambled around the edge of the world, looking for a way to pass across the boundaries of the Lunar Lattice, but also a possible escape as any true cat would while imprisoned. This is why prisoners worship Lorkhaj the Impulsive and Reckless, for he offers them thoughtless determination and provocation. Digging his teeth and claws wherever he could, he finally latched on to the Moons, as they allowed him to observe his prison while keeping distance.

Sh! Calm those screeches my little one, for you might wake the Clan Mother! But know that your disgust is not misplaced: Lorkhaj defiled the Moons, and made them his own. His decaying carcass formed the rotting parts of the Moons, hidden behind the world.

Why do you think the Moons are known as the Limit of our world? Because Lorkhaj hijacked them and made them so. But the Moons know better. For when the Land of the Cats grows dark, the Moons shed that foul parasite, and join to form a full Moon. Lorkhaj, being the noisy brat that he is, flounders for attention, surrounding the One Moon, making it look as dark as Namiira, the Great Darkness, herself. But this one knows the truth, as every real Khajiit should. This appearance gives the One Moon a dark façade, affording the moniker the “Dark Moon,” a facetious and insulting caption from our paler neighbours.

However, their sisterly embrace magnifies their blessed light, to send down the illustrious Mane to lead us all. This practice has transpired since Azurah ended the Dawn, and will finish when she begins the Dusk anew. And so, despite Lorkhaj the Greedy selfishly attempting to steal the Moons and their Motions and cross the Lattice, the lovely Moons protect us still, and bless us with their sugars, so in return we Khajiit must be vigilant, to maintain the Lattice, especially if any seek to break it.

That was your story. Is it a deception, you say? Ha! This one sees that you have been listening closely. You are Khajiiti through and through. You are clever and cunning, sufficiently so to know whether this one has corrupted the story. Anyway, my sweet, as this Khajiit said, that WAS your story. It has been told the same way since Mafala’s first institution of the Clan Mothers.

But there is now an addition. A new section that needs to be added. A new danger to the lives and survival of the Khajiit.

The Thalmor; they are the litter of Ahnurr: driven by anger, they seek to destroy other litters so that they might not need to share their joy. They are fools, and we Khajiit know this.

No! Do not dismiss them, my darling. All Khajiit did at first, but then the worst happened: our Moons disappeared. No, kitten, they were not lies or rumours, as you clearly thought: the nights were dark with Oblivion’s Void for two years. And then the Thalmor suddenly are able to return the ja-Khaj’ay? GRRRRAAAGGH! They forget that Khajiit are Khajiit, and we know our realities and falsehoods.

The Thalmor have never cared for us or the sacred Moons, so there is no reason to return the sacred Moons to our world. They committed this heathenry for two reasons: firstly, to try to destroy Nirni’s noble protectors; secondly, to destroy Lorkhaj! Dunces! We must at least credit revere obstreperous Lorkhaj for this: he knows how to deceive, and the Thalmor are his greatest prey! Ha!

Also, they do not have the power to remove the Moons! If they did, they would already control all worlds, and allow terrible Ahnurr to cross the holy Lattice. No, they simply banished the Moons from our world, but those buffoons deny the phenomenal glory of the hallowed ja-Khaj’ay. The Phases-as-Motions kept the worlds bound, but the Moons simply travelled around other worlds, as they do when they disappear, as granted by their majesty. They sneaked about, like any good example for the Khajiit, and so deceived the Thalmor. Our anguish was genuine, but reproductive issues were lies to boost the the idiocy of the Thalmor. If the Motions occur, we can breed, no matter what. All the Khajiit need to do is reject the Thalmor, and await the arrival of the new Mane, whoever that sanctified individual may be.

Nevertheless, these Thalmor seek to remove the Moons, and we must be prepared to repair them in the novel ways, should they ever falter again. Remember the foolish act of gullibility? This is the way of the Thalmor. They believe deception and Illusion to be one, but they are wrong. Deception, is an ancient form of Magic, in its true form, as given to us by blessed Magrus and holy Azurah. So well trained are the Thalmor’s Illusory skills that they have managed to delude themselves. Ha! Clods!

No, my dear, do not weep. This supplementation is just to make you a clever and cautious Khajiit. Remember: well placed arrogance is confidence, and vice versa. Only foresight and hindsight may distinguish the two. You now know the truth of the world, and how to ward against evil, and dance in the Light of the divine Moons.

So sleep now, mewing kitten. And, know that one day, the Moons will allow our spirits to travel to travel to paradise via the Breath and Embrace of Khenarthi, if we follow the Sugar God, the Riddle’Thar. We will all be led, eventually, to Llesw’er, the Sands Behind the Stars, where the sacrosanct Moons bathe us in their most beautiful, comforting and astonishing light, feeding us with sugar, and filling us with a warmth without end.”